Genuis! Bestphal's Resume!
616 200 1670
lucas.westphal@hope.edu
Hello My name is Genuis Bestphal I am legally a freshman college student. I am interested in taking
psychology!
here are a list of my skills
I have a 27 doctorates and 298 diplomas as well as a noble prize! and a GPA of 200000000.
My intellect cannot be described in a foolish meduim such as the written measley paper and letters that
you would require of me!
I have grauduated from highschool and have the diploma to prove it!
I have Worked before
Example: I have worked before example: the time the CIA and FBI both attempted to kidnap me but were
seemingly shocked that i kept escaping!
I have a variety of skills that you would benefit from!
I am great at creative problem solving! I have worked with people i dont like before "like your pithy us
'Government' " and know how to work around people who are unkind to me!
In conclusion You would be honored to have me attend your measely college however i am aiming greater! I have
been reached out to by the PLOINKERAL an alien empire of psychics who have noticed my incredible intellect
and have decided to accept me as their new ruler.
Now why would the future ruler of an alien race be reaching out to our college?
Simple questions and
simple minds require simple explanations clearly... My superior intellect is reaching out to your measely
college for one purpose! To decipher your complex monumental stupidity. Well that certainly is fascinating what
really called to write to you like this is to simply diswade you from attempting to contact me in anyway.
Foolish being such as yourselves could not even begin to list the intelligence of beings such as I. Some have
called me an egoist of the highest degree. My clinical psychologist deemed me a quote "narcisism so extreme it
theatens the rotation of earth because of your big head!" However my head is normal sized despite my massive
intellect. Fairwell Hope college may we never meet! Fairwell.
Sincerely,
a superior being!